Sad Lunch Dungeon

Some Nazi clown got placed into an inappropriate position of power today. I’m not going to comment on it cuz the fool is getting enough coverage. Other than exemplifying the fact that democracy doesn’t work, I don’t really care much about that turd and his tumbles around the bowl. On to more important things!

There is this dungeon in El Centro that provides eating options for worker drones. It’s a sad place, maybe something like a prison commissary, but the main distinction being that the work prisoners choose to come here. How fucking sad is that? Very. Yet, here I am. It’s a miserable place in which to consume your semi-nourishing lunch, and still, there’s often no tables for the work prisoners to settle down to eat their meals. Sometimes you buy your expensive lunch, walk it around the place looking for a place to sit, and end up looking like a fool as you explore the caverns of tables only to find out there is no place for your sad ass to sit and eat your sad ass meal. I decided to document this daily misery, as a warning to future generations of what a shitty world we lived in during 2017 and the years around it. Sad lonely people trying to find lonely tables to eat crap food all by themselves! Something has gone terribly wrong. Click on the video above for the shocking truth! I’ll try to parse it out below.

(Uhh, I was eating a burro and chips from a place in this mall. Turn the sound down if you don’t want to hear the biting and chomping that goes with that process.)

0:34 One dude finds a table. Good for him.
0:54 Some other dude gets up to leave. Fine by me.
2:26 New person finds a spot to eat, only vacated about a minute ago.
3:01 Damn, guy seems super pleased with his burrito purchase, even does some weird religious cross thing before he eats it.
3:02 At the same time, some sad sack has to peek in to see there are no tables available. Wot a loser!
3:04 Two seconds after the loser leaves dejectedly, some dude leaves his table open for the next sad eater. Cursed luck! What a miserable world we live in!
3:16 Loser finds a spot, off in the distance.
3:54 Four friends find a spot to have lunch, putting all these solitary eaters to shame for being such anti-social loners. I take another bite of my burro.
4:21 Another loser is Denied!
5:33 Some loser starts inadvertently humming, what a mess.
7:24 Two decide they’ve had enough of this dark lunch dungeon and make a break for it.
8:00 Behind the pillars, a table!
8:37 Guy gets up to split this misery town.
10:00 I stop the camera cuz I am about to go. My dismal lunch is coming to an end!

Props to the burrito guy for using a water cup for his salsa, now that’s a hack worth mentioning.

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