Do you remember back when people used to visit restaurants, kitchens, and food trucks to purchase food items just to eat? You know, back in the days when you ate food because you were hungry? Cuz that other option of starving and dying was kinda lame? Well, that need has never left us and humans still have that instinct for nourishment, the basis of daily survival. It just seems to have disappeared because somewhere along the way, the food delivery systems we rely on to provide us with calories, decided to also dabble with the profit motive monster that hovers over everything, and it’s begun to chart the course of our regular meals. Fusion trucks, recreational eateries, tourist destinations, meals as entertainment: it’s the new norm. Yeah, it might be a fun night out, a nice way to meet up with old friends, a safe way to “explore” the inner city, another notch for your Instagram identity, but goddamn is it annoying when you just want to take care of a base necessity.
Ahh, the good old days. Will they ever return?
And in comic form! I made this little page – ooooooh, quien sabe, hace un chingo – back when I first got this website going and learned about easy to use WYSISYG page builders, as you will surely notice. Please excuse the terrible scans and illegible text, they are a window into the technology of the time. I did the actual comic by cutting out lil’ pieces of paper, writing on them, and pasting over the word bubbles of some generic Mexican novela I bought at one of the green wooden shacks on Broadway in downtown. Yes, it may be hard to believe, but before the arrival of tepid tourists lured by slutty egg sandwiches and suburbanites playing at adventure before they settle down forever in a gated community, El Centro was a place where all kinds of interesting things could be had and experienced. The newstands carried newspapers people read, ¡Alarma! magazines that required intestinal fortitude to consider a peek, and my favorite, the box of recycled brown inked novelas. For something like 4 for a buck, you could pick any of your choice, from Libro Sentimental, Historia Semanal, Novela Policiaca, or the one I got these graphics from, El Romance Mensual. And since I didn’t care for the stories (just the graphics please) they were a bargain!
But anyways…so yeah, the shitty thing you are about to read, if you so choose, is a true story, names changed to protect the innocent until proven guilty. It’s basically a where are they now vignette after those euphoric times when we were in the streets and it felt like the whole of this miserable society was surely about to collapse in this time of reckoning. I guess I was off by a few years, eh? Soon!
Click here for the heart warming tale!
There’s always some new place to try in the greater LA metro area. For good or bad. But it’s usually fun to venture out and see what’s what. This review brings us to Pasadena, right next to the Ralph’s where I can buy those damn food pouches my cat seems to prefer. Might as well get my breakfast taken care of as well.
100 years ago today, Lincoln Heights got its new and current name. It used to be East Los Angeles. Happy Birthday!
Also, on this very important day, I saw a man giving his pet rooster a bike ride. Lincoln Heights is truly a special place.
Underneath this ugly building on 5th and Flower is a hidden food court where worker bees can get some lunch. I’ve been here a few times, there are some okay options when you are trapped in the vicinity for your legally required food break. Glad we still have those. Today we opt for some HR’s!
The Huevos Rancheros at Kitchen Mouse are terrible. No fried tortillas, not even dipped in oil, just boringly warmed up. Black beans underneath. An ungodly amount of vegan “cheese”, when regular cheese doesn’t even have a place in HRs, so why bother? Worst of all is their “enchilada sauce” when it should be a ranchero sauce.
If you’ve ever microwaved a frozen Trader Joe’s enchilada dish out of hunger and desperation at work, then you’ll know exactly what this tastes like. It’s that goopy texture of flour and binders, the acrid taste of chile powder instead of chiles, and lots of cumin. It may be a slight nod at the red sauces from the American Southwest, which can be really good when prepared with attention and care, but nope, not here. This tastes like some canned shit people have grown accustomed to consuming, nostalgic flavors from an era when you bought taco shells in a box. Nothing I can truly understand, but hey, some people will eat it. It’s Mexican food for our guero friends.
Even though the eggs were cooked proper and the pepitas were a good touch of texture, the cabbage slaw points to the fact that this dish is an abomination.
In total, this thing is a slog, don’t waste your time.